What if you couldn’t have a baby? And your mother offered to have one for you

by singlemomseeking on September 6, 2012

Mother-daughter relationships are so delicate.

Bringing in Finn: An Extraordinary Surrogacy Story — a new memoir by Sara Connell, a life coach with a private practice in Chicago — gives me hope that my mother and I might turn a corner and find a place of trust and love.

This is the story about a couple who wanted so badly to have a baby. After years of trying alternative medicines, Sara and her husband, Bill, turned to Western fertility treatments, including many expensive, painful rounds of IVF.

But after Sara lost a third pregnancy — including the devastating loss of twins at 22 weeks — they started to lose hope. At first, Sara did not share any details about her struggles with her mother. In fact, their relationship was so distant that Sara would not stay at her parents’ house with she visited them.

She writes: “I hadn’t confided in either of my parents about not having a period, or that Bill and I might have a fertility issue.” Yet, slowly, Sara opened up to her mother, Kris. And in turn, Kris responded with open arms.

In February 2011, Sara’s 61-year-old mother delivered the greatest gift of all to her daughter: Sara’s son, Finn.

Here’s how this book touched me:

I’m grateful that I’ve never experienced any fertility issues. However, like Sara, I’ve longed to heal my relationship with my mother. It was so inspiring to read how Sara and her mother forgave each other, moved past old hurts, and stayed side-by-side to bring Finn into the world.

Now that I’m the mother of two daughters (like my own mother), I’ve recently reached out to her. Again. In a long letter. She recently responded, and as I re-read her lines right now, I lift my head and feel her love.

Seal Press is giving away two copies of Bringing in Finn! Leave a comment below. 

I’ll choose two winners via Random.org. Deadline is Friday, September 21, midnight EST.

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