What he’s teaching me

by singlemomseeking on March 4, 2011

One of my media clients recently made a generous offer: to let us stay in their ski cabin for the weekend. The last time I went skiing, I was 12 years old and my step-father had taken me up the mountains. It was cold and windy, and I didn’t have the right gear. It was a miserable day.

So, whenever my daughter has asked (which she has many times): “Can you take me to the snow and teach me how to ski?” I’ve gently let her down.

Enter Thunderpants: that man loves to ski. And he has been working on me. “Let’s go to the mountains! It will be fun!”  This lovely ski cabin offer seemed like a sign.

So, last weekend, after packing the car with pillows, snacks, and borrowed snow gear, we headed up to Lake Tahoe. My daughter shrieked when she saw the first patch of snow. We signed her up for lessons on the tiny bunny slope as a beginner, where I figured she would stay for the day.

Not quite. Imagine my surprise as TP and I were riding the ski lift later that day — going over one of the bigger hills — she glided beneath us. I cried cold tears, I couldn’t help it.

“You got bit by the ski bug,” I told her later.

“When can we ski again?” she asked.

But back to me — right when I got off the lift the first time, I looked down the hill and did a fast snow plow. How the heck would I get down? It probably wasn’t that steep, it just looked scary. I just stood there, with my poles digging in the snow.

Thunderpants was at my side. “Just go slowly,” he said.”Take it one turn at a time.”

It’s the same message he tells me whenever I get stuck, whether I’m in the midst of a mother-daughter conflict or stressed out about the future.

Slow down.

Take a deep breath.

Take it one turn at a time.

So, I pushed off and slid down, one turn at a time. My legs shook, as he cheered me on.

That’s just how it is with TP, and by the time I went down the third hill, he’d given me a new name: “Suzy Chapstick.”

He kept yelling it out: “Suzy Chapstick!” and it cracked me up.

More than that, he’s the guy who encourages me to take a break and relax. Before I met him, I didn’t know how to relax. He used to tease me on the weekends because I was ALWAYS on: working, cleaning, cooking, running errands, and working some more. He’d say, “Love, it’s time to get off your computer and log into life!”

So, when you’re afraid or overwhelmed, how do you slow down?

When was the last time you took the break that YOU deserve?

If it has been too long, how do you plan to slow down soon?


Oh, and don’t forgot to wear your helmet along the way:


P.S. Congrats to my recent Crocs winner, Amy

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{ 4 comments… read them below or add one }

How Does She Do It Mom March 10, 2011 at 9:37 am

I am sitting here grinning ear to ear like a teenager lol! I love this post…for a lot of reasons but mostly because of him…you have clearly found him (which I already knew). The one who supports you and guides you and picks you up when you fall down. What a blessed finding in life…doesn’t it make life that much more peaceful and enjoyable when you are walking it with the perfect partner for you?

I am terrible at knowing how and when to slow down…as a single mom in the past I never had the option. Now it is ingrained in me to just keep motoring on and on…until Brian usually pipes up and does exactly the same as TP does for you.

In fact just this morning is an example of it…it has been a crazy month and a half with a BS custody case that was levied at me by my ex, a move into the city and all the other life stuff in general…I am pooped!! This morning with the kids at their Dad’s for spring break Brian suggested I sleep in an extra hour and turned off the alarm…at 11am he snuck back into the room kissed my shoulder and woke me up! I freaked because i had lost the morning of work and he just said…”you needed sleep baby” ….I know how you feel! 🙂


BlueBella March 7, 2011 at 2:00 pm

Love this post!!! I’m so happy you have such a fabulous guy that helps encourage you while enriching your life. Big time score for you and your daughter.

Last time I went skiing was just months before I became pregnant with the twins – I should have known when their father led me to a ‘surrounded by black diamonds, no other way out’ trail that I was in trouble. I skidded on my tush, in tears, both back to the lodge and out of that relationship, eventually:)

These days, unwinding for me is dreaming about long afternoons in the hot sun on the back of the Harley with MM. I can’t tell you how many hours we spent that way, back in the day. Wow – I can almost taste a cold beer as we stop for a break in a small town dive. Ahhhh, bliss.


T March 6, 2011 at 9:02 pm

I LOVE this post.

You knew I would, right? Because my man is teaching me the exact same stuff. Sounds like we landed just what we needed, yes?

Love to you both, Ms. Suzy Chapstick. Give snuggles to the new snow bunny too! 🙂


Memoirs of a Single Dad March 6, 2011 at 7:20 am

Ah life. It’s full of bunny hills and double black diamonds. That’s fantastic your daughter took to skiing so quickly. My first time downhill skiing was on a middle school field trip. I nearly broke my leg.

Unwinding for me is sitting on the back patio on a breezy evening. Sometimes wine is involved. Sometimes I light a candle or the tiki torches. It’s so relaxing and just takes me away from the stresses of the day.


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