Going on a familymoon

by singlemomseeking on November 10, 2010

“So, where’d you go on your honeymoon?”

People who don’t me very well have asked me this question a lot lately. Those who know me well would answer this way: Oh, Rachel, didn’t go on a honeymoon.

There are lots of theories about how the honeymoon tradition first started, but most us smile when we think about why couples traditionally split town as fast as they could after the wedding ceremony: so they could, um, consummate their marriage in the physical sense.

If I’d wanted to plan a honeymoon with the goal of starting a family…Well, we’ve already covered that. Don’t get me wrong: I would have loved to pack our bags and go on a little trip right after our wedding ceremony.

One of the reasons we got married in the fall was because we wanted to have a backyard wedding in the Bay Area. We could not have wished for a more beautiful day, with the sun shining through the oak trees, and dancing under the warm starry sky.

Yet, being a mom and all, this timing also coincided with the beginning of the school year. So, a few days after our wedding, there we were, at Back-to-School night. (I did not know that my daughter’s teacher would announce the news, and all the parents would applaud as I blushed.)

Jetting off for a honeymoon at the start of my kid’s school year just didn’t seem fair. So, now what?

We’re going on a familymoon.

When I tell people that, eyebrows usually go up. Maybe a “familymoon” isn’t as common as I would have thought?

We haven’t nailed down all the details yet — but my new hubby, daughter, and all agree that a short trip with lots of time outdoors would be fun. No, this adventure won’t be filled with any Niagara Falls romance (although we’ll have separate sleeping arrangements wherever we go). Yet, it will give the three of us time and space to bond. (I hope.)

Tell me:

Do you think that going a familymoon is a crazy, stressful idea?

Or, if you got remarried, would you consider going on a familymoon? If so, what would your ideal familymoon be like?

(If you’re a former single parent who’s now married, please chime in on this, too!)

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November 10, 2010 at 11:05 pm

{ 18 comments… read them below or add one }

LiL'Devil Mama November 10, 2010 at 10:56 pm

Love, love, love this idea!

When I find someone to share this life with I would love to steal this idea. Sort of the coming together of a family and a private opportunity to celebrate together and come out of it recharged and ready to take on the world!

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T November 11, 2010 at 7:20 am

I still love this idea. I think your daughter is, of course, on board with this idea too!

Me? I wouldn’t mind a fun family trip but I also need my alone time with my man. Maybe 2 trips? Or one big one where the kids joined us later?

Can’t wait to hear where!!

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singlemomseeking November 11, 2010 at 12:39 pm

@T: Yes, we are hoping to plan a delayed honeymoon at some point in the future… when we find a good time in between school and work, and line up childcare. It just takes some good, long-term planning (and, um, some $$ saved up), right?

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BabyFirstTV November 12, 2010 at 12:08 pm

What a great way to celebrate getting married and sharing the experience with your daughter! Love the Idea of a FamilyMoon. We love reading your blog and look forward to reading many more. We think that a familymoon is the perfect way to simply enjoy each other’s company! Love this idea.

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Mommy to the Monsters November 12, 2010 at 12:28 pm

I think it is a good idea…

What I ALWAYS daydreamed about doing is going on a honeymoon with the new hubby first (whenever that time comes) and then having the kids join us a week OR 3(lol) later for a”familymoon.”

I can dream, can’t I?
.-= Mommy to the Monsters´s last blog ..The Chronicles of Nausea Part 152 – Introducing The Mister =-.

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Swati November 12, 2010 at 6:30 pm

I think it’s a wonderful idea and it really works for you so go for it!! We are taking a honeymoon because honestly, I feel like whatever we do, we seems to always have one of our 3 kids along – with the exception of 1 four day getaway and 2 weekends (in 2 years)…every other vacation or getaway has included kids…so we NEED a getaway with just us…and I just cannot wait!

I am actually a huge fan of family everywhere (I am Indian and I think it’s a cultural thing), so just in case any of my “steps” are reading this, I also can’t wait for our family moon this summer :-) !

Swati
.-= Swati´s last blog ..Training Bras and Booger Eating =-.

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Deesha November 13, 2010 at 6:59 am

Hey, Rachel! Because our wedding was a destination family wedding (just us and our girls, and they were an integral part of the ceremony) in Key West, that kinda counted as a familymoon, I guess. We went on a separate honeymoon, actually before the wedding. Yes, we’re weirdos. LOL…seriously, we had airline credits that we had to use before they expired and that was before the wedding, so…
.-= Deesha´s last blog ..Elmo- Othello- and a Co-Parent Walk Into a Bar- Can You Laugh in the Face of Co-Parenting Drama =-.

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Crazy Computer Dad November 14, 2010 at 3:03 am

SGG have had a few ideas, but life events have made a few changes to those plans. Our boys do see their other biological parents regularly, and over the extended school breaks. Much like you, we planned our wedding for fall just after the school year began so leaving immediately wouldn’t have been a good idea. Especially since the boys are still working out their relationships and interactions. We are planning a couple short trips in the coming months, one that includes a tropical setting and another that includes snowboarding! We are also looking at doing something with all three boys the first week after school gets out in June. We’re still working on those details though. Likely, it will be a combination of camping, hiking, and some sight seeing. :-)
.-= Crazy Computer Dad´s last blog ..We dressed up as hikers for Halloween =-.

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Nancy November 14, 2010 at 5:52 pm

When I remarried (sigh, but since divorced) … my new husband planned a familymoon for us, and my 2 kids, to enjoy a week at Disney/Florida. One week after that trip he had planned a week long honeymoon for just us in the Bahamas. It was so thoughtful that he planned it all, especially the kids first :)
.-= Nancy´s last blog ..Alias- YellowJacket =-.

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Emma November 15, 2010 at 2:57 am

I think it’s a great idea! So sweet and family orientated!
.-= Emma´s last blog ..The Green-eyed Monster! =-.

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Soccer Mom November 15, 2010 at 4:31 am

We didn’t take one either–we bought a house instead. Our small wedding was fun, and perfect and cheaper than most weddings. We put a lot of cash in on the house, so why spend more right now? We did take the kids to Niagara Falls in the summer, with both kids, and there were romantic times, as well as fun-filled family goofiness. We did sleep in separate beds in the summer since we weren’t yet married. I think a familymoon is a beautiful idea…do what’s good for your family :)
.-= Soccer Mom´s last blog ..The Secret of Long-Term Marriage =-.

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Kari November 17, 2010 at 8:37 pm

We considered a familymoon in the end we decided no mooning at all because we would really like to save for a house. Plus the school year too, we got married at the tail end of August meaning school was starting soon too. A week after our wedding school started.
.-= Kari´s last blog ..I need to get to this thing more often =-.

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Lisa Mills November 17, 2010 at 10:46 pm

Actually, your familymoon sounds better than my honeymoon. I won’t go into detail, but way too much time was spent watching Braves baseball. And I wasn’t the one watching.
.-= Lisa Mills´s last blog ..Work-at-Home- Seasonal Phone and Chat Customer Support Jobs with Intuit =-.

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Nicki November 18, 2010 at 8:07 am

Go for it. You guys will have a blast.

Us…we’re hoping for a babymoon. Just a little alone time one last time while we’re expecting.

You know you have to tell us all about it, right?
.-= Nicki´s last blog ..Happiness is having someone to hold onto… =-.

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singlemomseeking November 18, 2010 at 8:39 am

Congrats Nicki! I didn’t know you were having a baby… Clearly, I’v got catching up to do!

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Post Divorce Coach November 18, 2010 at 4:32 pm

I think it is great. When I married my husband, we planned it right before spring break, then we took my kids on a cruise with us. It was perfect. It made us feel more like a family, and they felt like they were a part of the fun!
.-= Post Divorce Coach´s last blog ..Post Divorce Advice =-.

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Kim November 23, 2010 at 11:35 am

I think it’s a great idea and would definitely do the same thing. Though I would also probably plan something later just for us….romantic long weekend or something. I think bonding the new family is way important.
.-= Kim´s last blog ..My Body Clock =-.

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Sarah February 2, 2011 at 7:32 pm

I realize I’m really late coming to this party, but this topic is near and dear to my heart.

We’ve combined our wedding with a big family vacation. My fiance and I are renting a large house for the week before our wedding, where we will vacation with my two kids and my parents, brothers, and their wives and children. The wedding is planned for the day before we leave. We’ll wed, party, pack and head home after a 7-day family trip.

With my custody arrangement, we have also managed to plan so that my fiance and I will have a few days to ourselves, too. The day after the wedding, we will return home, and the next day my kids will go to their dad’s house for their regular custody time there while we take a nice, quick trip to relax for a few days. I am hoping it works out the way we’ve planned.

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