“There’s something I want to tell you,” my man is saying.
We are out for a rare night all to ourselves. First, we had gone to celebrate Depot Dad‘s birthday (yeah!). Then, we had dinner at a small, sweet French restaurant in San Francisco. Thinking back, something had seemed off about LG at the restaurant. He was being weird — a bit uptight maybe? But I’d waved it off. It had been a long week at work for both of us.
So now, we are walking through Union Square, passing by some rowdy teens in the shivery coolness.
That’s when he stops right next to the garbage cans.”I’ve wanted to ask you this for a long time,” he says, reaching out to put his hands on my hips. “I want to join your family.”
He’s crying. I hold onto him tightly, and he holds me tighter. Either something is very wrong, or…. He lets go. He’s pulling something from his coat pocket. He’s still crying, and in between, he’s telling me that he has known for a long time that he wants to be with me.
So, when he asks me to marry him, what do you think I say?
I hardly look at the ring. I just want to look at him — and squeeze him. I want to tell him how much I love him and how I want to BE with him.
“Are you sure?” he says.”Do you need some time to think about this?”
“I’M SURE! I’M SURE!” I blurt out.
That’s not all: he pulls something else out of his pocket. It’s a little box, and when he opens it, there’s the sweetest necklace for my daughter. That’s when I start to bawl.
Later, he tells me that he’d wanted to propose at the @Wsanfrancisco — the hotel bar where he’d kissed me for the first time, the same night we met. But that spot upstairs is now a loud, roped-off night club. In my mind, everything was just right.
And all I can think about now is:
Who knew that someday in the future this darling goofball…
Would meet this funny kid….
….And fall in love?
We’re talking about getting married before 2010 ends (shriek!). We’ve already gone into party-planning mode — that goes for my daughter, too, who has already picked out her dress.
As you can tell, I’m bouncing, joyous, and just so happy. I’m really the lucky one.
As my little sister puts it: “You scored, Rach.”
Believe me, I’m thrilled. I really get to BE with this incredibly loving, romantic, genuine, sometimes-nerdy, and sexy man — who has also become such a GOOD friend?
Wow. Wow. Yet, I’m also realistic: after parenting solo for a decade, I’ve almost gotten the hang of it. There’s something simple about our mother-daughter duo.
I used to scoff at that analogy about a relationship being like riding a roller coaster, but I know that there’s going to be some screaming along the way. Bringing this man into the mix will come with challenges for everyone. It already has, and YOU have already helped me out with many dilemmas (thanks!) such as when to let your boyfriend discipline your child and to how to make boundaries around sleep.
That’s said, it’s very important ALL of you know this:
Sure, I’m getting married… yet I am a single mom forever.
I’ve been a solo mom for a long stretch (10 years!). I’ve leaned on you just as much as you’ve leaned on me. Please know that I’m here.
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