When two single parents are dating each other

by singlemomseeking on January 20, 2009

One year ago, I asked you, readers, to please explain: How do you tell your child(ren) that you’re dating?

I was still in the innocent world of a second grader when I put that question to you. (Kids get savvy real fast, don’t they? But that’s another post altogether.)

This purpose of this post is to introduce you to Phil, a very articulate single dad reader who often comments here. I’ve had the chance to meet Phil in person — and I’m thrilled to announce that he has a new girlfriend.

In fact, it was reading your single parent blogs that inspired this single dad of two high schoolers to go back online!

I was growing tired of spending most nights with just my kids and wanted to get out more,” Phil says.

One of the first women he noticed online was “a young, attractive, single mom. She seemed smart, funny, her profile was well written — and she lived just within the 30 minute rule. Honestly, I only wrote to her.”

“I don’t believe in love at first site or anything like that,” he says. “But when I first saw her in person, I instantly knew that I had a connection to her. I didn’t know if it would be mutual–”

It was.

They met almost three months ago. Now he’s smitten.

She has been divorced for five years — and her ex-husband died last year. About a month into dating, she suggested that Phil meet her daughters. (She also suggested that he bring some dessert. Oh, those single moms with their brilliant ideas!)

Everyone hit it off, and they’ve gone on a few kid-friendly outings together since.

So, what’s the problem?

He hasn’t exactly explained to his two teenagers that he’s serious about her.

“My son figured out that we were dating, and he would like to meet,” he says. “I told my daughter I was seeing someone. But neither of kids seem too interested.”

Here’s what I’d love to know:

Should Phil have a heart-to-heart about the fact that he has a serious girlfriend?

When I asked him, he suggested that maybe “there isn’t anything to discuss”?

After all, his kids haven’t asked any follow-up questions about his girlfriend.

So, should this dad carry on and date away?

Or, should he sit down and have a heart-to-heart with his teens?

What do you think?

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