Comments on: Do single dads prefer to date women without kids?

By: Rachel

Rachel — Thu, 09 Feb 2012 01:19:37 +0000

By the way it’s a bit obnoxious to say a woman who doesn’t have children hasn’t learned enough “life lessons.” Having a child no more ensures maturity than not having a child does immaturity. That’s a huge generalization!

By: Rachel

Rachel — Thu, 09 Feb 2012 01:09:35 +0000

As a single woman with no kids I’ve had the opposite experience. I dated a divorced man with two kids
His married friends asked “what was wrong with me” because I wasn’t married or even divorced. Even he once “jokingly”referred to me as an “old maid.” I had just turned 35 at the time. I understood that he didn’t want to introduce me to his kids and even he admitted that I never asked him to put me before his kids. I just feel like single dads shy away from childless women.

By: Single Dad

Single Dad — Sat, 21 May 2011 17:00:20 +0000

Well, I guess not. It depends on the person. Each guy i guess is different. Some guys may like it, some may not.

By: dc

dc — Mon, 15 Nov 2010 03:19:06 +0000

I agree with John that as a single dad there’s almost no point in dating a woman without kids because “they just don’t get it”.

I don’t think it would absolutely stop me, but I just think the odds of someone without kids understanding what you are contending with when you do have them is wildly unlikely. I mean, it’s hard enough just to find someone who’s basically compatible, without also being someone who (a) understands the demands of having children without herself having them (b) doesn’t have it in the back of her mind that whatever you bring to the relationship she “could find the same in some other guy, but without the baggage”.

I personally think (b) is wildly unlikely, possible, but terribly unlikely, but it’s a belief people cling to.

So, to answer the question about the bachelor though – I think it says nothing whatsoever about people in the real world. He is given an incredible opportunity to select as few ever get. His selections say nothing at all that can be generalizable. Any real-world single dad knows his best opportunities for a relationship lie with single moms.

By: Eric

Eric — Sun, 19 Sep 2010 15:38:49 +0000

I’m a single dad (34) with primary custody of my daughter (9). I think it starts out easier dating someone without kids because they are accessible, but ultimately it becomes more difficult because we have to be selfless, so I personally prefer a woman with one or two kids (not trying to put together a basketball or football team though!). I also used to think having an open arrangement with the ex was the right thing to do, but going by the decree and minimizing all contact really works best for everyone as it minimizes the chances for drama.

Wholeheartedly agree with Mike on the life lessons learned thing.

By: Rachel

Rachel — Wed, 15 Sep 2010 06:11:04 +0000

I am a single mother to 4 children… all very young and my youngest is disabled (she has a very rare symdrome, but is cute as a button). I have done a lot of deep thinking recently, though, and have come to the conclusion that even though I am still in my early twenties… I do not have a chance at dating until my kids are in their teens. The men I have dated have not been single dads and always fight to get more attention than my children – or cannot hold their own (okay, so my daughters are a little high-energy… heh). The only single dad I dated turned out to be one of those low-life ones who doesn’t want to pay to support his own child (from an ex-wife) and never wanted visitation. I mean… if he didn’t even want his OWN kid…?

By: Superman

Superman — Wed, 23 Dec 2009 18:47:16 +0000

Just remember, the life you have now with your boyfriend/girlfriend with kids will probably not change. Don’t expect it to change. If you are staying in it cause you think you will get more time down the road, you are kidding yourself. If you are not happy now, you will not be happy later. Break up if you are not content with the relationship as it is. Stay in it if you love the person and don’t mind the struggle two complex lives bring to the table.

By: BigLittleWolf

BigLittleWolf — Thu, 13 Aug 2009 23:26:57 +0000

I have found that single dads understand my life as a single mom – much better than those who have never married or never had kids.

It’s a matter of individuals – there are great men who have never been dads (and love kids), great men who have been dads (and love it), great men who’ve been dads and finished the active parenting so they just don’t want to “go there” again.

I understand that. I have teens. Light at the end of the tunnel. I adore kids, but date a man with little ones? No. I’m in a different place. Date a man with teens? No problem.

I think gentleman “Mike” made a very important observation (above). He likes women who are mothers. He understands that we’ve learned a few things about life, and about loving. My hat’s off to Mike for getting it.

What works? Whatever feels right between two individuals + kids, at a point in time.

By: m

Thu, 13 Aug 2009 06:50:09 +0000

I am a 27 year old single mom. i used to be so good at dating. now that i am a single mom, it feels weird and scary. i don’t even know where to begin.

By: Michelle

Michelle — Sun, 09 Aug 2009 18:19:54 +0000

Wow! There are some harsh comments on this website about women without kids. I dated a full-time single father for 2 years. I was kind, patient, understanding, blah, blah, blah and all it got me was dumped. Is it really too much to ask for one night every other month to spend alone? If it is then I guess I am not cut out to date a single dad. Now, I love his children and I can’t find any advise about how to maintain or if it’s possible to maintain a healthy relationship with the kids of your ex-boyfriend.