Ann Coulter. “It’s your fault, single moms”

by singlemomseeking on January 7, 2009

Update: This post just got picked up by the Los Angeles Times, if you want to read it there:

“Single mom lashes back at Ann Coulter, who loves it”

“Well, a few hours after that NBC broadcast, into our e-mail box plopped a stinging rebuttal to Coulter’s Theory on Single Parenting, which is that single moms, abetted by a cheering and enabling liberal media, are responsible for much of American society’s ills, especially crime and violence because there’s no male influence around to tame the younglings.

Her theory, perhaps not by accident we’re just saying, is especially provocative given the impending inauguration of a new president who was raised by a single mom and grandparents.

The rebutter here today is Rachel Sarah, identified as a single mom from the Bay Area, who contributes to a mothers website. And we decided to give her some space to respond….”

Single mom lashes back at Ann Coulter, who loves it”

(I was on the edge of my seat, waiting for Ann Coulter to tell me how much she “loves it”… where is she?)

~~~~

Ann Coulter went on the “Today” show this morning, claiming the world’s problems can all be traced back to single mothers.

After watching the interview, I wrote anOpen Letter to Ann Coulter” at MomLogic.com.

~~~
While some readers see my point of view (thanks KitKat4Real and others!), quite a few readers agree with Ann Coulter.

“Obama-ite,” for example, writes:

I pity you. It is a shame you see the world through such simplistic eyes. It is a shame that you can’t even see beyond your own self absolution to realize that what Ann was talking about was the glorifying of single motherhood as if it were some sort of status to be achieved…Keep on telling it like it is, Ann!”

“Tom C.” adds:

“Well, Ann is right about the fact that most criminals are the product of single mother families. But I guess it’s worse that she bruised your ego than we do anything to help those kids.

What do YOU think?

Here’s what I say about Ann Coulter blaming us — single moms — for society’s problems.

~~~

Over at Singlemommyood today, Dr. Leah and I want to know why Ann Coulter claims that single mothers have launched “an endless attack on the nuclear family.”

We have a little talking to with Ms. Ann Coulter here.

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{ 31 comments… read them below or add one }

Sarah January 7, 2009 at 9:14 pm

In general I try to forget Ann Coulter exists, and for the most part I’m able to achieve that. When she starts doing media blitzes for her books though, it’s hard to ignore her ignorance.

Your response is classic, I love it. I don’t think anyone could’ve summed it up better :-)

Sarah´s last blog post…There is just news. There is no good or bad.

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Phil January 7, 2009 at 9:34 pm

Coulter sells books by making stupid outrageous statements. You can’t argue with people like that because it just gives them more attention.

Yes, poor, uneducated, single, minority mothers have a higher percentage of children who cause crime – that’s a fact. The reason is obviously so much more complex than Coulter tries to make it. You don’t sell books by making something complicated.

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singlemomseeking January 7, 2009 at 9:48 pm

Phil: Believe me, I almost turned down writing that post because I thought it might raise her book sales. It’s tight in the publishing industry right now.

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VJ January 7, 2009 at 11:10 pm

“It’s your fault, single moms”

Well of course..

Me, I’ll call Global Warming on single moms too. I mean Mother Nature? Ever see her depicted with a spouse (say with father Time)? NO! Of course she’s a single mom, and if you’re following closely at home, always had a gaggle of noisy troublesome kids always getting into trouble of one sort or another.

High Oil Prices, Terrorism, to the excessive halitosis suffered by the coke & heroin addled skeletal lying sack of Repug political-porn star Coulter is always someone else’s fault. That the way the game works. And it works well for her. MediaMatters.org has the story on all her carefully crafted media lies. Cheers, ‘VJ’

VJ´s last blog post…Coulter compounds falsehoods in "point-by-point " response to Media Matters ‘ fact-check of Guilty

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Crazy Computer Dad January 8, 2009 at 4:08 am

Back in the Spring, CNN ran an inflammatory article about much the same thing. I was sucked in and realized later that they posted the most outrageous headline to get more readership. In both cases I don’t believe that what they are really referring to is single moms (or dads). For some reason they just say the breakup of the family, or single moms because the statistics they mention appear to coincide with minority and inner city populations. If they say THAT, then they get labeled as racist. It is easier for Ann and company to deal with the outrage of a small minority of the middle class than the other. Just my take on it.

I guess the other problem is that there are a great many weak minded folks that succumb to this drivel because they mindlessly follow the conservative right where ever they want to go. I would rather say that mindlessness, whether you be conservative or liberal, is the root of the worlds problems today. It also makes it really hard to ignore Hype-Mongers like Coulter.

It is easier to sit back and point out the problems than it is to jump in and help. Is Ann donating all the money from the sale of her books to solving the problems of America’s poor?

Crazy Computer Dad´s last blog post…Must be cattle nearby….

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SingleParentDad January 8, 2009 at 5:10 am

Who’s Ann Coulter, does she read The Daily Mail? Can’t generate the energy to google.

And I think that societies issues are more likely to break down to accountability.

The government, certainly in this country, introduces too many rules and regulations, and in the end it means that everyone blames them when things go wrong, rather than look at those doing the crime/bad things.

Hope that makes sense.

SingleParentDad´s last blog post…Tried And Trusted

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Trish January 8, 2009 at 5:20 am

I had always heard her name thrown around politics, but was generally unfamiliar with who she was…

…until yesterday. The topic of conversation aside, I thought she was an obnoxious, rude, extremely noisy woman.

I skimmed the comments to your post on momlogic, and the commenters that said “what about the absent fathers” had the most valid point, I think. I’d be interested to learn the percentage of single moms who never had any desire to be single moms, and are sacrificing and doing what they have to do to make sure their kids have everything they need…all on their own. The problem isn’t the mothers…it is most definitely the fathers that walk away from the responsibilities of their actions.

Of course, there are always exceptions that rule. But if Ann can over-generalize, then so can I. Hmph.

Trish´s last blog post…And…..exhale….(part I)

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Lance January 8, 2009 at 5:55 am

I watched that program. Ugh, I can’t stand Coulter, she’s a total blowhard and a sensationalist. If it weren’t for TV, she wouldn’t exist.

Lance´s last blog post…Snowboarding, Sickness, and a Breakdown at the Grocery Store

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wandamd January 8, 2009 at 7:12 am

Coulter is a sensationalist who is attempting to pad her pockets in this tight economy. Simple.

I am one of those “liberals” she snidely talks about but one who subscribes to the ideal that everyone has a right to their own opinion. Do I promote single parenthood…honestly I don’t think any of us who are doing it would. It’s hard. We are consistently trying to balance personal life with home life and some of us a career. Relationships outside Mommy/Daddy-hood take more work. It is even harder when one parent isn’t active in the child’s life. Wait…this applies to every single married parent I know too at one time or another.

I would be more apt to agree that “absent” parents are the problem than “single” parents…and it isn’t the present parent’s fault if one party walks away…you just do the best you can. My daughter is lucky enough to have both a Mommy and a Daddy who are active and supportive in her life…but it doesn’t mean we need to be married to each other in order for her to turn out “right”. This is really where she missed the mark and took her facts out of context.

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Kelly January 8, 2009 at 8:38 am

Well, first of all – Ann Coulter is getting rich off of our reactions to her insane ramblings. She says outrageous things on purpose, and I think the best way to beat her is to ignore her. Or laugh at her and walk away.

Second, I like the comment on Momlogic that said why does she blame single moms and not absent fathers? Even if she wasn’t totally full of crap, that would be a better way to put it, “men walking away from their children are the cause of many of society’s problems”. But no, there’s that double standard again. All the blame and responsibility gets put on the woman’s shoulders.

People are in prison because they made bad choices. Even if those choices were the result of bad parenting, it comes down to the individual parent and not whether or not they are married. Conservatives like her would be the first ones to attack someone who tried to say a criminal is the way he is because of his mother. They’d say that was just a crutch. And yet it suits her well when she’s selling a book.

Kelly´s last blog post…Lots of dates

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T January 8, 2009 at 9:02 am

Wow. See how out of the loop I am? I don’t watch TV and have no idea who this lady is.

I watched the video with my jaw dropped open. Seriously?

Loved your response Rachel. Beautiful and to the point.

And I agree with the above commenters, why the single moms and not the absent fathers? Or is she just referring to feminists in general? Is she simply stuck on the women who choose to hit the sperm banks and become single mothers on their own?

(Then, the peacemaker side of me steps in.)

I’m just not sure anyone needs to be attacked. Her or us.

Attack generally comes from fear or a belief in lack. We all fear what we do not know or do not understand. She doesn’t understand us. She hasn’t been in our position. We don’t understand her. But we all do understand the belief in lack (of love, attention, money).

So in some ways, I think we can all see why she’s doing this.

I think we can all agree that she is trying to stir up the pot to generate attention and cash.

T´s last blog post…"Click"= Risk-worthy?

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Lori W. January 8, 2009 at 9:06 am

Ann Coulter makes up anything that stirs people up even if it means ignoring history, truth, etc. She would run over her grandmother and smear her too if it meant a higher spot on the NYT book list.

This is a woman who wrote in a book that George Marshall and Harry Truman were less than Americans (I want to say that she said traitors but I don’t have that information right in hand and I don’t want to be like her).

Statistics can be twisted easily, especially by someone who is already looking for a point of view. I wonder what she would say about the chapter in Freakanomics about abortion and crime rate. I’d also like to know what Ann Coulter will do to help kids. (Actually does she do anything to help anyone but herself?) Grrr.

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Mike January 8, 2009 at 10:33 am

I missed that interview, but I do know there is a secret society of single moms out there. There mission statement is to bring civilization to its knees by destroying the nuclear family and raising deliquents. You usually can see examples of their dastardly plans running around Walmart on the weekends. They must be stopped. So date more single moms so they won’t be single anymore. That’s my motto at least.

Mike´s last blog post…Must Love Dogs 2

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Susan January 8, 2009 at 11:14 am

Here’s info from Wikpedia:

“Coulter has been engaged several times, but never married.[11] She has dated Spin founder and publisher Bob Guccione, Jr.,[12] and conservative writer Dinesh D’Souza.[13] In October 2007, she began dating Andrew Stein, the former president of the New York City Council, a liberal Democrat. When asked about the relationship, Stein told the paper, “She’s attacked a lot of my friends, but what can I say, opposites attract!”[14] On January 7, 2008, however, Stein told the New York Post that the relationship was over, citing irreconcilable differences.[15]”

Well, gee, now there’s a shocker.

I also think we can discount someone who criticizes widows for “enjoying” their husbands’ deaths (the “9/11 widows”) and that America would be better off if women lost their right to vote so we could avoid a Democratic president. Because, you know, all men must be neo-conservative Republican nitwits, too.

Sheesh, don’t pay this windbag any more attention…but you may want to read her bio for fun!

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Ann_Coulter

Susan´s last blog post…New year, new love…sort of

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Susan January 8, 2009 at 11:19 am

BTW, I agree with the other commenters here — love Mike’s response! — but especially the last lines of wamdamd’s comment.

But here I am still thinking about Ann. Shame on me!

Susan´s last blog post…New year, new love…sort of

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avigail74 January 8, 2009 at 12:37 pm

Gee, is it my fault that my child is thriving, has a deep love for learning, refuses to skip school or homework, feels deeply for people and animals, and just loves her mother AND absent father. What about us—those single moms who have extremely successful children who are so compassionate about life? Did she overlook us? What about Barak? How come he’s so successful even though his mom was a teenager when she had him and he only saw his father twice in his life? Hmmm…explain that to me.

And, goodness, what about other people who commit crimes who come from loving, two parent households? Let’s not foret about Ted Bundy, the Columbine killing spree, or, even George W. Bush! Ha! Are they perfect because they had two parent families?

Someone stop me before I faint!

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pisceshanna January 8, 2009 at 4:23 pm

My personal fantasy is that Ann Coulter will be reincarnated as a poor, black, lesbian single mom and then she will be able to see how the world really works. Its pretty easy to make the statements she does when you are a rich, white, straight, childless, attention whore.

Karma’s coming for her scary-ass Man-Hands.

pisceshanna´s last blog post…The interview

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dadshouse January 8, 2009 at 6:41 pm

Coulter doesn’t get it. Single moms are involved with their kids. It’s the deadbeat dads who don’t stick around that are the problem. (No offense to anyone stuck with a deadbeat) I’m sure the case can be made that two-home parents are at fault as well. But since I’m one, I tend to see the bright side of how my ex and I coparent and raise our kids.

Ignore Coulter.

btw – Single Mom Says had a nice take on this, too: http://singlemommindy.blogspot.com/2009/01/single-moms-guilty.html

dadshouse´s last blog post…Sexy Arrangement

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singlemomseeking January 8, 2009 at 10:12 pm

Dad’s House: Oh, yes, Mindy knows that she inspired me with that post, http://singlemommindy.blogspot.com/2009/01/single-moms-guilty.html

Thanks Mindy! We gave you some link love at Singlemommyhood, too. You rock Mama!

PiscesHannah: That reincarnation statement is intense and real.

Avigail: I miss your smart, spunky of a girl.

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singlemomseeking January 8, 2009 at 10:15 pm

Oh, Mike, you’re too much: “o date more single moms so they won’t be single anymore. That’s my motto at least.”

Wow, Susan, thanks for doing all the research!

Yes, WandaMD, thanks for making that awesome point: “I would be more apt to agree that ‘absent’ parents are the problem than ‘single parents…”

T” I continue to be amazed at how you rise above: “Attack generally comes from fear or a belief in lack. We all fear what we do not know or do not understand. She doesn’t understand us. She hasn’t been in our position.”

Thanks for that.

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Mydria January 9, 2009 at 12:46 am

Rachel, I loved your comments. However, I am on both sides of the issue.

I don’t think Ann Coulter should have attacked single moms, but I do think she has a point…the fact that single parenthood even exists has created some problems in society. Don’t get me wrong…I think that many single parents have done a fine job of raising their children alone or in co-parenting situations, but I also think that there would be fewer problems in society if children were raised in traditional, nuclear families – as long as the relationship between the parents is healthy.

Therefore, I think we should place more of an emphasis on healthy partnering and relationships. If people had a better sense of who they are and what they want, I think their relationships would be more successful so that when children come into the picture, the family would be less likely to fall apart.

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laurakim January 9, 2009 at 8:33 am

Seriously? The worlds problems can be traced back to single mothers? SERIOUSLY?

I have no idea who Anne Coulter is and clearly I dont want to know who she is!!

I am all for rising above but in general being a single mother is not a choice someone makes because it seems glamorous?

laurakim´s last blog post…Interview with ME

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Pat January 9, 2009 at 3:12 pm

The only think I could think of while reading this was ” is she CRAZY? really… and the people who support her. I am not a single mom but I was raised by one, and I can assure you I am not a criminal nor are my 3 siblings (we all went to college and such and are not hanging out in alleys waiting to mug people).. Women do not become single parents because it’s fun.. I guess women should stay with abusive husbands for the children is what she is saying.. or maybe my mother should have brought my father back from the grave with a little voodoo session or such (he died when I was 7)… Seriously, she is probably looking for some fame of some sort that is what I think.

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ocean January 10, 2009 at 9:59 pm

I must second dadshouse: ignore Coulter… she is like an attention-seeking toddler.

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Honey January 11, 2009 at 10:38 am

Ann Coulter’s claim that single mothers are responsible for all the ills in society is based, I believe, on numbers crunched by the book Freakonomics, where he claims that the legalization of abortion was responsible for the crime drop of the 1990′s.

That being said, for every single mother there is a single father. The moms just happen to be the ones raising the child, many times, because the father won’t.

Also, while it is true that children raised by single moms are statistically more likely to engage in criminal activity (and be associated with other problems), this is a correlation not a causation. The cause is most likely the socioeconomic status of the single mom raising the child. This is also true of race and crime…while certain minorities are statistically more likely to engage in criminal activities, it is more likely that the CAUSE is that those same people are of a low socioeconomic status and aren’t aware of/haven’t been able to take advantage of certain other opportunities.

Third, as I said at Dadshouse blog, if Ann Coulter got struck by lightning I would LAUGH. She is
1) a 50-something
2) attorney and professional writer
3) who has never been married
4) and doesn’t want kids
5) who MAKES A LIVING
6) saying things like all women should be housewives and moms rather than having a career,
7) and who also MAKES A LIVING
8) making political observations
9) while simultaneously claiming that the 19th amendment should be repealed.

Please. The cognitive dissonance between her life and her politics/social views is so huge it could, like the Grand Canyon, be seen from space.

Honey´s last blog post…Snowboarding, Sickness, and a Breakdown at the Grocery Store

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Kat Wilder January 11, 2009 at 11:57 am

I’m going to take what Mydria said and run with it — and I hope that doesn’t make me a pariah.

But Ann Coulter isn’t all wrong.

My thinking on Coulter and single motherhood — or rather, single motherhood by choice — is way too long to get into here, so I’ve posted it on my blog here: http://blogs.marinij.com/katwilder/2009/01/single_moms.html.

I’ll be curious to hear your thoughts.

Kat Wilder´s last blog post…He’ll be sorry he dumped me!

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Dee January 12, 2009 at 9:48 am

Who is this biatch?? Wow! just finished watching her interview with the ladies of The View … she is something else!!!

Dee´s last blog post…What’s your NEW YEARS RESOLUTION?

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NappyKitchen January 12, 2009 at 11:39 pm

Using hate and fear mongering to suppress a segment of the population. That is SSSSOOOOOO 1960s! ;)

NappyKitchen´s last blog post…Dandruff in your Nappy Hair

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testeddad January 17, 2009 at 8:10 pm

I recently reviewed much of the same literature about broken families and single mothers. Single mothers cost the American taxpayer $112 Billion dollars every year.
The Georgia Family Council and Institute for American Values published “The Taxpayer Costs of Divorce and Unwed Childbearing” in 2008. Their conclusion on page 5 is, “Based on the methodology, we estimate that family fragmentation costs U.S. taxpayers at least $112 billion each and every year, or more than $1 trillion each decade.”

That doesn’t include the private lawyer costs during divorce. Child and spousal support are just private welfare payments. When single mothers stop whining about entitlements and start earning their own way in life, they might understand how correct Ann is on this one point.

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Evan January 19, 2009 at 8:29 am

Having dated many single moms, I agree with Ann. I think it’s a shame so many people get easily offended rather than looking at the source of the problem: poor choices in breeding partners. If these single moms would take the necessary precautions, maybe Ann wouldn’t have to write a chapter that “offends” you all so much. And if it were only one child that each single mom had, the ladies might have a point. But most are repeat offenders many times over. And what everyone here is afraid to break the statistics out on is how many of our US single moms are black and repeat offenders. That certainly would get everyone’s panties in a wad. I also think many women have children due to the ticking of their biological clocks but never intend to actually be wives.

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