Comments on: Lost and vulnerable http://singlemomseeking.com/blog/2008/10/lost-and-vulnerable/ Remarried and Remodeling Wed, 08 Feb 2012 06:21:46 +0000 hourly 1 http://wordpress.org/?v=3.0 By: What’s your life plan for 2009? | Single Mom Seeking... http://singlemomseeking.com/blog/2008/10/lost-and-vulnerable/comment-page-2/#comment-8007 What’s your life plan for 2009? | Single Mom Seeking... Mon, 29 Dec 2008 21:16:44 +0000 http://singlemomseeking.com/blog/?p=2052#comment-8007 [...] Instead, I believe in intention. As in, having a purpose. [...] [...] Instead, I believe in intention. As in, having a purpose. [...]

]]> By: How to stay sane when you’re dating during the holidays | Single Mom Seeking... http://singlemomseeking.com/blog/2008/10/lost-and-vulnerable/comment-page-2/#comment-7753 How to stay sane when you’re dating during the holidays | Single Mom Seeking... Fri, 12 Dec 2008 15:02:28 +0000 http://singlemomseeking.com/blog/?p=2052#comment-7753 [...] Before you go ahead tell me that the holidays aren’t the best time to start dating again, I know. Can anyone say “vulnerable“? [...] [...] Before you go ahead tell me that the holidays aren’t the best time to start dating again, I know. Can anyone say “vulnerable“? [...]

]]> By: The man I hope to love | Single Mom Seeking... http://singlemomseeking.com/blog/2008/10/lost-and-vulnerable/comment-page-2/#comment-6956 The man I hope to love | Single Mom Seeking... Tue, 11 Nov 2008 05:42:33 +0000 http://singlemomseeking.com/blog/?p=2052#comment-6956 [...] You like to cook, and feed me. (I make a mean lasagna!) [...] [...] You like to cook, and feed me. (I make a mean lasagna!) [...]

]]> By: Honey http://singlemomseeking.com/blog/2008/10/lost-and-vulnerable/comment-page-2/#comment-6820 Honey Mon, 03 Nov 2008 23:20:18 +0000 http://singlemomseeking.com/blog/?p=2052#comment-6820 I'm over-vulnerable with the BF, and trying to strike a balance. I never realized before how compartmentalized I am...at work I'm known as the girl who never lets *anything* get to her, but when I go home and the BF asks me one questions about my day I burst into tears sometimes! I'm trying to learn how not to overwhelm him with things because, after all, he only has so much emotional energy, too. <abbr><em><em>Honey´s last blog post...<a href="http://honeyandlance.com/condoms-birth-control-sexual-frustration" rel="nofollow">Help! My BF Won’t Use a Condom!</a></em></abbr></em> I’m over-vulnerable with the BF, and trying to strike a balance. I never realized before how compartmentalized I am…at work I’m known as the girl who never lets *anything* get to her, but when I go home and the BF asks me one questions about my day I burst into tears sometimes! I’m trying to learn how not to overwhelm him with things because, after all, he only has so much emotional energy, too.

Honey´s last blog post…Help! My BF Won’t Use a Condom!

]]> By: NappyKitchen http://singlemomseeking.com/blog/2008/10/lost-and-vulnerable/comment-page-2/#comment-6775 NappyKitchen Sun, 02 Nov 2008 03:01:06 +0000 http://singlemomseeking.com/blog/?p=2052#comment-6775 When I feel vulnerable (this week was a killer for me, too!) I read, chat on the phone, play with the kids, draw ... anything but sit alone with my thoughts. That, as I learned this week, can make the Bad-Decision-Maker in me surface. When she comes out, it's hard to shut her up! ;) <abbr><em><em>NappyKitchen´s last blog post...<a href="http://www.nappykitchen.com/blog/2008/11/rip-mr-studs-terkel/" rel="nofollow">R.I.P. Mr. Studs Terkel</a></em></abbr></em> When I feel vulnerable (this week was a killer for me, too!) I read, chat on the phone, play with the kids, draw … anything but sit alone with my thoughts.

That, as I learned this week, can make the Bad-Decision-Maker in me surface. When she comes out, it’s hard to shut her up!

;)

NappyKitchen´s last blog post…R.I.P. Mr. Studs Terkel

]]> By: Alicia http://singlemomseeking.com/blog/2008/10/lost-and-vulnerable/comment-page-1/#comment-6763 Alicia Sat, 01 Nov 2008 17:01:07 +0000 http://singlemomseeking.com/blog/?p=2052#comment-6763 Hmmm...Is there a such thing as feeling vulnerable & cynical at the same time? After not dating for sooo long, I'm finally ready to "jump in", but at the same time I'm still critical & picky. I agree w/ SDMktg-we shouldn't have to bend over backward to prove how great we are! Bottom line is, the other person WANTS to see how great you are, or they don't,period. Hmmm…Is there a such thing as feeling vulnerable & cynical at the same time? After not dating for sooo long, I’m finally ready to “jump in”, but at the same time I’m still critical & picky. I agree w/ SDMktg-we shouldn’t have to bend over backward to prove how great we are! Bottom line is, the other person WANTS to see how great you are, or they don’t,period.

]]> By: Kim http://singlemomseeking.com/blog/2008/10/lost-and-vulnerable/comment-page-1/#comment-6742 Kim Sat, 01 Nov 2008 05:19:54 +0000 http://singlemomseeking.com/blog/?p=2052#comment-6742 Rachel, you asked: How do you keep it together when you’re feeling vulnerable? Keep repeating your own words to yourself: "I was hurt once before by you." I find that a *healthy* (not extreme) dose of cynicism in a new relationship helps balance vulnerability quite nicely. I'm practicing it myself, being suddenly single after 24 yrs of marriage. One of my new crushes says all the "right" things. It's a little overkill sometimes, but it makes me smile and I'll enjoy it while I'm getting it. But I'm not falling for it hook, line and sinker. Careful and cautious, my dear. If it's meant to be, it will be. In the meantime, enjoy yourself, and never regret anything that puts a smile on your face. Rachel, you asked: How do you keep it together when you’re feeling vulnerable?

Keep repeating your own words to yourself: “I was hurt once before by you.”

I find that a *healthy* (not extreme) dose of cynicism in a new relationship helps balance vulnerability quite nicely. I’m practicing it myself, being suddenly single after 24 yrs of marriage. One of my new crushes says all the “right” things. It’s a little overkill sometimes, but it makes me smile and I’ll enjoy it while I’m getting it. But I’m not falling for it hook, line and sinker. Careful and cautious, my dear. If it’s meant to be, it will be. In the meantime, enjoy yourself, and never regret anything that puts a smile on your face.

]]> By: SDMktg http://singlemomseeking.com/blog/2008/10/lost-and-vulnerable/comment-page-1/#comment-6736 SDMktg Fri, 31 Oct 2008 23:47:40 +0000 http://singlemomseeking.com/blog/?p=2052#comment-6736 Yes! That's what I have found and I'm thankful every day. I never want to go back to being fearful because I let someone else "make" me feel like I'm not good enough. We all deserve to be loved for who we are without jumping through hoops. The sad thing is that a lot of the time we do it to ourselves and the other person doesn't even want us to jump through them. <abbr><em><em>SDMktg´s last blog post...<a href="http://www.tailgatingtimes.com/index.php?/archives/136-Sweet-Gs-Shot-of-the-Week-Red-White-and-Blue.html" rel="nofollow">Sweet G's Shot of the Week - Red White and Blue</a></em></abbr></em> Yes! That’s what I have found and I’m thankful every day. I never want to go back to being fearful because I let someone else “make” me feel like I’m not good enough.

We all deserve to be loved for who we are without jumping through hoops. The sad thing is that a lot of the time we do it to ourselves and the other person doesn’t even want us to jump through them.

SDMktg´s last blog post…Sweet G’s Shot of the Week – Red White and Blue

]]> By: singlemomseeking http://singlemomseeking.com/blog/2008/10/lost-and-vulnerable/comment-page-1/#comment-6731 singlemomseeking Fri, 31 Oct 2008 22:08:41 +0000 http://singlemomseeking.com/blog/?p=2052#comment-6731 Wanda: He did notice the hearts... and you're right, SDM: I'm sure that I wanted more. What you say really resonates: aren't we enough, just as we are, without DOING so much for someone else? We're deserving, just as we are, aren't we? Wanda: He did notice the hearts… and you’re right, SDM: I’m sure that I wanted more.

What you say really resonates: aren’t we enough, just as we are, without DOING so much for someone else?

We’re deserving, just as we are, aren’t we?

]]> By: SDMktg http://singlemomseeking.com/blog/2008/10/lost-and-vulnerable/comment-page-1/#comment-6729 SDMktg Fri, 31 Oct 2008 22:04:18 +0000 http://singlemomseeking.com/blog/?p=2052#comment-6729 Funny that my comment follows wanda's. I read this post this morning and my thoughts on being vulnerable? Stop doing so much. I killed myself to be romantic in my marriage when I should have been taking care of myself. She never appreciated the gestures and veiwed it as desperate. Looking back on it I realize it was all very one-sided and I deserved better. I still do nice things for my girlfriend but I do it when I want to not for any other reason. Cutting the hearts strikes me as you wanting to get something from A and I'm not sure he's deserving of that. I think a card and a call would have been perfect. You are extra vulnerable because you already know where this is going. It is a strange time with the economy and the coming election. Everything feels sideways. I'm hoping for some calm come Thanksgiving and the holidays. <abbr><em><em>SDMktg´s last blog post...<a href="http://www.tailgatingtimes.com/index.php?/archives/136-Sweet-Gs-Shot-of-the-Week-Red-White-and-Blue.html" rel="nofollow">Sweet G's Shot of the Week - Red White and Blue</a></em></abbr></em> Funny that my comment follows wanda’s. I read this post this morning and my thoughts on being vulnerable? Stop doing so much. I killed myself to be romantic in my marriage when I should have been taking care of myself. She never appreciated the gestures and veiwed it as desperate. Looking back on it I realize it was all very one-sided and I deserved better.

I still do nice things for my girlfriend but I do it when I want to not for any other reason. Cutting the hearts strikes me as you wanting to get something from A and I’m not sure he’s deserving of that. I think a card and a call would have been perfect. You are extra vulnerable because you already know where this is going.

It is a strange time with the economy and the coming election. Everything feels sideways. I’m hoping for some calm come Thanksgiving and the holidays.

SDMktg´s last blog post…Sweet G’s Shot of the Week – Red White and Blue

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