I am glad to see that you went out on a limb and decided to go out with him. It’s good to build up different experiences, even if they don’t pan out the way we wanted them to.

I really enjoyed reading about your date, by the way. I can’t wait to go on my first real date as a single mom…it’s been almost 2 years! I’ll definitely post it on my blog, so watch out for it!

Jennifer: Now that everyone has pointed out how shady it was to give me his parents’ address… I can’t help but agree. He DOES sound younger than me. But he’s actually going on 40.

VJ: Haven’t heard from you in a while! As always, you are very rational and thoughtful. I appreciate that scratching-my-itch metaphor. Done! I’ve moved on.

At first, I felt like you should send the book with a sticky on his section saying, “this would’ve been better than a late night text” to get the point across. After thinking about it, it’s not like he’d care as he obviously has some waiting for him right there anyway, and it’d just be a waste of your money & time. Plus, he might see it as a way to try to get back in with excuses for his actions, which were totally unexcusable.

Then after reading about sending it to his mother’s house?! WTF?! SHADY!!!! That’s like the guy who used to give you a pager or work # instead of a home # (before cell phone became only phones obviously) with some excuse about never being home, but really he had a woman waiting for him there! Ick!

When I read the comment about him having read the book already, having an inflated ego, and thinking he was getting some so why make the effort, I could see that. He obviously was keeping all his options open with that booty call text and showed his true priorities. Even if you were just visiting, you deserved all his attention especially while kissing. Even if you could have been a potential ‘one night stand’, you deserve respect and attention.

So NO sending of the book to him! He can go to the library or the bookstore and read his chapter if he’s that interested. What a loser. I’m sorry your fantasy didn’t match the reality, but what wonderful closure and an opening of a new door to someone who deserves your time!

1.) He answered a text while on a date with someone from across the country who had specially called to see him.

2.) He said that the text was from a ‘young lady friend’. Not his momma, GF, wife, Aunt, Bro, Uncle or Pastor. His ‘young lady friend’. No game there. And he then went ahead and answered it! In mid embrace. Game, set & match! Geez that’s just stupid on so many levels.

3.) He actually followed up the next day to say he ‘had a good time’. Well naturally, he wants to keep in contact too. But you’ve built up this total fantasy of this guy mostly based on his looks, and you’ve finally met with the reality. A good looking & evidently in demand ‘stud’ on the make who does not even have the time for current prospects, he’s too busy taking care of a would be harem of circulating prospects. Hence his Parents addy for all mail, so as not to upset GF 1-5+ who regularly stay on and off at his place, or theirs. SSDD. Player.

So yeah. Don’t send the book. It would be supremely silly to do so. And far be it for anyone to tell you what or who to desire. But eventually, by your 40′s say? You’ll probably be moving away from those ‘low information’ encounters. They’re too taxing on everything in the end. Too much trust invested. Too much hope. They’re good for scratching an itch. That’s about it. He’s undeserving of your fantasies, now or then. But now you know better. Sorry about that! Cheers & Good Luck, ‘VJ’

I hope Amazon ships my book internationally. If not, let me know. I’ll make sure you get a copy by ship or plane… not UPS (ha).