When men are confused

by singlemomseeking on June 24, 2008

Maybe it’s because the world feels unsteady right now, as if there’s a constant undertow.

Or maybe it’s because there’s a Capricorn moon with Saturn in Virgo.

All I know is, there’s a comment awaiting moderation right now in response to my post about “Kate Hudson: “Boys, Meet My Son.”

The comment, however, has nothing to do with Kate Hudson or her son. It was sent by M’s father, from Ireland. He goes by the user name “Cupid Zen.” (Oh, the irony!)

I can’t remember the last time I heard from him. It has been more than a year for sure. The comment says, simply:

“Happy B Day Big Girl”

I’m assuming that the “Big Girl” he refers to is M, but her birthday was way back in April.

Perhaps the “Big Girl” is yours truly, but my birthday is towards the end of July. (And, am I really a Big Girl? I thought I was a woman.)

I haven’t responded yet. Should I?

P.S. Oh, and don’t even get me started about that cute, sweet not-yet-divorced dad who recently asked me out. I told him flat out that I’d love to hang out “as friends,” explaining that I’ve learned the hard way not to date men who are in the throes of a painful, bitter break-up.

My experience with not-yet-divorced men has led me to believe that they should either:

1. Not date because they are simply avoiding reality by diving into a new fling;

Or, 2. Date “recreationally,” for fun, because it’s so darn exciting to get back out there, but they’re too confused to be present for a real relationship.

So, we met a couple of times and had some insightful, open conversations. I thought we were off to a genuine friendship, it felt right. Then, without saying a word, he decided on the sly that he’d pursue a friend of mine. Maybe it’s a hunter man-thing I’ll never understand. What happened to good ol’ honesty?

If a guy is leaving sweet, flattering messages for both women, back to back… well, what was he thinking? Women talk, especially smart, honest ones. My girlfriend had the wits to call me and give me the scoop.

See what I mean by confused men?

Photo by Staci Becker

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