Comments on: Accidentally on Purpose

By: Devotion, a book giveaway | Singlemommyhood.com

Devotion, a book giveaway | Singlemommyhood.com — Sun, 25 Apr 2010 16:55:13 +0000

[...] magazine reviewer Mary Pols – whose incredible memoir details her own journey into single motherhood — [...]

By: Who needs a man to have a baby? | Single Mom Seeking...

Who needs a man to have a baby? | Single Mom Seeking... — Thu, 13 Nov 2008 20:54:11 +0000

[...] was on live with Glenn Sacks, the media commentator who has proclaimed that the “rise in out of wedlock births is bad news for America’s [...]

By: Do you always use a condom? | Single Mom Seeking...

Do you always use a condom? | Single Mom Seeking... — Tue, 09 Sep 2008 17:28:38 +0000

[...] no one in the audience dared to ask Mary about condoms last night, the night did have an unexpected [...]

By: Sonja

Sonja — Wed, 06 Aug 2008 04:51:28 +0000

Who really even plans to be a single mom. Things happen for a reason like in the book and many I’ve read happen with a few drinks and a condom pulling a disappearing act even though pulled out. I dated a guy a couple of times went to a party with him and a month later surprise. Me and the guy never worked out to many differences. He says he wants to be a part of my babies life but I’m a little skeptical cause I haven’t heard from him in over a month. But only time will tell. My baby is due on Christmas and I think thats the best Christmas gift I could ever recieve. It was nice to read a book and know I wasn’t the only one this could happen too.So thank you.

By: VJ

VJ — Thu, 05 Jun 2008 07:46:23 +0000

Folks, I finally read all the comments and I’m close to speechless. First off I totally agree with Kim that with love, kids are a gift from g_d that keeps on giving. They’re always teaching you more about life than you can return to them.

Still, all the ‘accidentally on purpose’ baby stories here by all these smart, ‘classy, educated and ambitious women’ as Kim put it, well, it’s always an amazing discovery all over again. Some where Dr. Jim Trussell is hanging his head and cueing up another ANOVA table and muttering under his breath, ‘Somethings never change!’Really. Cheers & Good Luck! ‘VJ’ [http://www.guttmacher.org/]

By: Morgan

Morgan — Wed, 04 Jun 2008 06:50:39 +0000

I call my “mistake” the un-immaculate conception. It was christmas eve, an accidental run-in with the ex, lots of champagne and holiday warmth, a drunken belief that the best in this man was finally actualized, no condom.

I found out I was pregnant on Valentine’s day and when I called to tell the father, he informed me that I was severely inconveniencing him, since he had a girl-friend (whom he had been dating for more than two months).

It was just going to be me and my baby from the get-go. Somehow I became wonderfully okay with that. Nine months gave me a chance to really come to terms with who I was and what I could give to this new life…Plus, nothing is a character builder like going to a child-birth class solo in the basement of a catholic church. =)

So excited Mary Pols is coming to Portland! Can’t wait to read her book and meet her!

By: Ms. Single Mama

Ms. Single Mama — Wed, 04 Jun 2008 02:51:49 +0000

Yep…very happy accidents! Thank god for condoms being left on the coffee table. : ) In my case anyway.

Rachel, this book looks fantastic – thanks for sharing.

By: singlemomseeking

singlemomseeking — Tue, 03 Jun 2008 22:08:24 +0000

BlueBella: I wrote a piece for Pregnancy magazine, May ’07, about dating while you’re pregnant and single. I’ll email it to you!

Kim, thanks for reminding everyone to put judgment aside… and focus on our children.

By: Kim

Kim — Tue, 03 Jun 2008 20:31:28 +0000

People make mistakes and it doesn’t matter how you got pregnant.. the result is the same… you emnd up with a child to love and have full responsibility for.If the father turns out to be irresponsible, it is unfortunate but you must deal with that and also come to terms with the error that you made such as a one night stand, or ignoring the red flags etc. As a young mother who became pregnant due to my poor judgment… I have learnt a lot both about myslef and also about the responsibility of my actions even if they are only for five minutes. It is very disgusting and upsetting to have people make judgmental comments when you are doing your hardest to provide and do the BEST for your child. That is something that some children in a two parent family never get. The point is, all children are a gift from God and we all have the responsibility to uplift and help each other because none of us are without sin, or for the non religious among us.. all of us have done things that at some point we know would be considered stupid/unscrupulous/careless/fill in the blank.

By: Betsy

Betsy — Tue, 03 Jun 2008 18:18:35 +0000

I had been dating Sperm Donor (SP) for 5 years and was engaged at one point. There were problems with his ex-wife that I could no longer handle, so he moved out and engagement broke. We continued to try to work on the relationship (marriage counseling). In a sense we became friends-with-benefits. 2 months after learning of the pregnancy, he stopped contact. We live in a small town (population 5000, county pop 18,000).

My daughter is is now 2 and has never seen SD. When she was 1 I started getting child support. When she was 1.5, SD filed for joint custody, name change (she has my last name), and visitation. That was almost a year ago. Joint custody was tossed and so was name change. He is still wanting visitation.

He hasn’t talked to me. During the court dates for child support, he never said a word to me. When he filed, he hasn’t said anything to me. The only he has spoken to me was when the judge ordered us to go to mediation 7 months ago. At no point have I been contacted by anyone in his family and they all knew about the pregnancy.

Sometimes life is better/easier w/o the SD around!! If only all SD’s could grow up, take responsibility and become a dad instead of staying a SD!