Yes, basically! Since I have yet to leap into the {sex in the same house as my children} club - scheduling as if it’s an appointment is the only way to go. My last guy lived a little more than an hour away as well, so dating him was a very costly experience.

Quickie? What is that as a single mom? Perhaps you could both play hooky from work one day (easier for you!) and have a date/rendezvous while Mae is at school…

I’m fortunate that my kids are gone one night a week. I NEVER get any sleep that one night a week though! As for the in between times - there have been a few sitters and quickies in the car in desolate areas - but I’m a more than a little worried about getting caught so that doesn’t work for me so well!

Well, with my man overseas for the past several months we have become very good at phone sex. While it’s not as great as the real thing, it keeps us close and connected in a way I’ve never found with a long distance relationship before. He has helped me open up verbally about my desires and it’s really an amazing experience. Plus it creates an anticipation that’s out of this world exciting!
It may be a fun “interim” solution between rendezvous!

OK, I will fess up on my one-time, super-slut, “I can’t believe I did that” moment.

He was going away for 10 days, and I had the kid with me for the prior few days and … he rented a hotel room near my workplace and we had a wonderful roll in the hay on my lunch hour!

I felt so incredibly “bad.” Talk about a turn-on!

Oh, and no one at work could quite figure out why I was so, um, happy all day.

I’m currently pregnant andhaven’t a clue how I’mgoing to work this out once the baby is here. Our sex life thus far is FAB, even better since I’m 7 months pregnant but I’m sure our creative juices will flow quite well after my 6 week checkup. LOL

Yep, scheduled like any other appointment. Also, school hours work well — if the Biologist can get away and get to you! Otherwise I’d say go to a hotel or motel and pay the fee — even if you’re just there for a few hours. Find a spot half-way!!

Good luck!!

Lunch time sex rocks. ‘Nuff said.

Hard to say. I lived with someone for a few years as a single mom, but that makes sex a whole lot easier. Since then I’ve had a couple of one night stands, but nothing that really tested my planning abilities as a single mom. My sex life these days revolves around a half-broken toy, so winning the duckie would be sweet!

More sleep overs at friends house’s for Mae maybe? Good luck! I know I’ll be right there with you soon. Benjamin’s growing an inch a day and learning how to open doors. Sigh.

I’ve found that the playing hooky thing works great once in awhile. But I have to say, I was sort of lucky to have B’s Dad taking her a couple days a month. Not lucky because I used to miss her so much it was horrible and always worried about how she was doing without me. We can’t win really.

I agree with the lunchtime scenario… very sexy, very fun….

My bad… I accidentally deleted this great comment from a mom who says “I can’t use my name:’

Comment:

I am a single mom of 2 toddlers and my boyfriend is a single dad of 1 toddler and he has her all the time (the mom passed away).

We have mastered the sex-in-the-car thing. Find an isolated place, even semi and just go for it you don’t even have to go to the back seat if you’re flexible enough, just straddle him and enjoy!

Once you get the hang of how you are both comfortable, it is A LOT of fun and very pleasurable for both parties. He’s gotten off work early and came to my work to take me to lunch and we’ve done it in my car in the parking garage outside of my work.

There is nothing more exciting and fun, it makes the “bed time” even better because you aren’t as stressed out about it.

All I can say for now is… I hope the Biologist reads my blog today (I’d asked him to please not read it so diligently because I was getting super self-conscious.)

I often forgot that this is his very first time dating a single mom — and you all are SO darn creative! Whew, I’ve got to catch my breath.

My job does not allow for a lunch time quickies however, when she was younger, I have had the quickie in the morning between dropping her off at daycare and arriving to work all by 8:30…..

Hotels are primo to beat that distance thing.

Sleep-overs for Mae can be hard. I know I was always reserving those favors for the “big emergencies” that may occur.

I have not done this but know some who have their man spend the night but set the alarm early and when the kid gets up, he and you are dressed with coffee and you declare, “look who is here for breakfast” It’s not my style to create such a dis-illusion but

I also once knew an elder couple who were dating while living in a nursing home (plus 80 years old) Sex is not allowed ,so they learned how to jam the elevator between floors….

I was not very creative at all.

V lived 700km away, and we had a month before we met.

I moved 400km closer (not because of him, was moving anyway) and got my old flatmate to come up for a weekend.

Let us just say the first date went very well and he became a regular visitor over the next 8 months, but as my boyfriend (and my daughter has been around life enough to know mothers do get such creatures - and it wasn’t like I had a chorus line of them, he was the first).

When my family come to visit, however, we have to be quiet and creative because it is a very small house.

Rachel,
Look into baby sitting co-ops. For some reason it seems like I’ve read you’ve done something like it before with your other single mom friends, but just in case I’m mistaken I’ll put it out there. I started talking to single parents I know about it, and one of them found a group on Yahoo. The Asperger’s support group I’ve been participating in is starting one up as well. Not everyone trusts other people enough to let their child go over someone else’s house for a sleepover though, and I know it is really scary for me, but maybe a weekend afternoon playdate or an extended evening playdate where you’ll pick Mae kind of late? Maybe you can swap off with other parents in the same situation?

While it can be very exciting in a very sexy way to be creative and get together in strange private places, semi-public places, public public places, natural settings (since you both like to hike) and so on…it doesn’t ALWAYS beat great sex in your own home.

I also meant to write:

HAPPY MOTHER’S DAY!!

I have been a single mom for going on 8 years now. I have to admit in the early years I did the come in late and leave really early but now when they are 11 and 9. I wouldn’t dare try that today. My oldest daughter would have much to say if I were caught. I actually haven’t truly dated in quite awhile but I suspect when I get the energy to put myself back out there I will have to be much more creative. Although one plus as they have gotten older is they often have plans of their own, such as girl scout sleep overs or camping trips. Oh and YMCA sleep away camp in the summer is AWESOME! I plan many things during those weeks that I can never do when they are around.

As a side note I am also a mother with no dad involved. You have to have an army of close trustworthy friends to have a social life. One problem with that is I find myself bombarded at times paying back all of those favors.

Thank you everyone for your creative ideas!

I am fortunate enough to be able to do the lunch or coffee thing at the moment, but it is not easy. I hate having to have a “plan” as to how it will happen. That said, I don’t want my 8 year old waking to discover something interesting happening!

I have her full time - I miss the male interaction but treasure my time with her. It is difficult to find the balance.