Relationships

What keeps you strong?

The ring tone on my cell phone is now set to Kanye West’s song, Stronger.

That don’t kill me
Can only make me stronger
I need you to hurry up now
Cause I can’t wait much longer
I know I got to be right now

Every time my phone rings, it reminds me to lean on myself — not on a man.

Seven years ago, I had just stepped into the world of single motherhood. I’d come home in November 2000 to find his keys pushed under our apartment door in New York City - after he’d locked it. He was not coming back. There was no note. Within a few hours, I’d sent him an email. I wanted to know if he was alive.

He wrote write back from somewhere unknown:

As much as I love and need you both, I feel that you are better off without me for now.

I need to feel that I can give and be more than I have been. I love you both.

~~~

 

Love?

I didn’t know what love was then. I probably still don’t know, but I have a better idea.

For months, I rushed everywhere like a mad woman, although I had nowhere to go. Today, at last, I’m finding pleasure in the simple:

Mae’s curls,

and the way she says “Thank you, Mama.”

Dark chocolate,

and carrot ginger soup.

Dinner with my single mom girlfriends and our daughters,

and your comments here.

Please tell me: What keeps you strong?

P.S. Kanye was raised by a single mom, Donda West, who died in November.

Photo of Kanye West from PRphotos.com

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